The Milking Cow

I started this exclusive pumping journey two months ago. This has been the most annoying but rewarding experience of my life. With my second baby I was really excited and ready to breastfeed. I was more experienced and knowledgeable but sometimes life has a different plan for us. I began pumping because my little one wouldn’t latch. I remember being so upset because I wasn’t able to breast feed my child again! With my son I tried breast feeding. He wouldn’t latch, I tried pumping and I just wasn’t into it so I had to give him formula. 

To all the moms out there, always remember you are still feeding your baby whether it is from boob, breast milk or even formula. With my son I was a 21 year old a new mom and very overwhelmed. I did what I had to do which was formula feed.

Now five years later I told myself I was going to stick to breastfeeding no matter what, because I feel like I gave up so easy on Bentley. I should have known with having a baby things don’t always go as planned. Once again I had a baby that wouldn’t latch and we tried everything! Yall, I pinched my nipples until they damn near fell off. I tried all those nipple guards and I went through all sizes. Finally I went to a lactation consultant. The things she showed me worked while we were there but when we got home everything was different. It wasn’t as easy and my patience was running thin but I didn’t want to give up! I took a break and my mom would comfort the baby. A little later I tried again, no latch. This happened multiple times. I was so upset I would start to cry while she was screaming her head off from being hungry and frustrated. I just wanted to feed my baby. Fresh out of the hospital, the baby blues were kicking in. Add this extra emotion to the equation and I started to get really depressed. Then I remembered there was one last option I hadn’t tried before which was pumping. So I got all hooked up to this automatic breast pump. I felt like a milking cow lol. To my surprise I had so much milk flowing! LIQUID GOLD PEOPLE! It was a success! I finally made the decision to just start pumping exclusively. It relieved me of milk and breast pain and baby girl was finally getting her milk from mama. Now just because she was getting my milk, I still had other doubts and concerns. At first I was mad with myself and upset because I felt like I wouldn’t get that bond with her like you would breast feeding. I cried to my husband for a few days he would just hug me and tell me she was still getting my breastmilk. He was very reassuring and he was right, it was MY milk. I think after a few days it came to me that I still had that bond with her. She would be sleeping and I would walk by her and she would instantly wake up because she smelt my milk. I started looking more at the pros of bottle feeding her, like knowing how much she was eating at one time and it even helped with building my freezer stash. I’ve learned to be disciplined and learned to prioritize everything. I’ve gotten better at time management and it makes me feel like superwoman.

Since I’m only two months into this journey I’m not going to say I’m a pro because I still stress about my supply. I still am not on a strict schedule (as much as I try). This post is just explaining how I came to this. I want to encourage other moms to try new things and not to give up. I will post as many helpful tips I can to help me and other moms continue.

*I will try to post as much as I can on this topic. Getting my thoughts together on what needs to be posted together* just bare with me 🙂